my husband left me because he was unhappy

I have not name called him once during the whole 6 weeks it took him to leave. You may click to view our members full profiles and contact the therapists themselves for more information. Im devastated. Because if you still love your spouse, what you really need is a plan of attack to mend your marriage. Yes I was pissed beyond belief. He ask me to hire someone to put his things in storage. Im starting to think he has someone else but he says not I cant believe he would do this to me so am I just being paranoid because I cant accept that he just doesnt love me anymore or is it a possibility because it seems like he has somewhere else to go . He is worried about more his material things than me or our marriage. Hey guys:) go to church! The devil has taken him or her over but it is up to you to be the bigger person and fight through it. He would always say. She didnt admit the affair part until this week. 6. Next thing I know, I was finding that he had taken all my jewelry including gifts he had given me and the pink slip to the vehicle we owned together. Its not a soap opera where the wife has to feed a mans ego and blow him every night.. Anyways thanks for your comment Im angry;-/ but I need to be a good role model snd keep it together. I just wish I could hit fast forward. 1. Where was I? So how do you know that a mental illness is there? Actually, we were both unhappy and I had also wanted out of the relationship for a while. I was devastated! I vow to maintain my essence for me. I pray this is Gods will. Her behaviour to me changed and she became distant, rude and put me on the back burner. And not a psychopath. When I confronted him he lied and said he had just came home late assuming that I was sleeping. We did renovations at her cottage from laying new floors to painting and installing a new wood stove. They have always talked and been friends through this whole separation. I tried under the circumstances but we need temporary help moving forward.. And more, Only 5? What can ido to ease her pain and stop from having a second divorce? If you think your husband is depressed too, and you're trying to save your marriage . Im paralyzed and just dont know where to begin? And although I honestly did not ever intend to hurt her, I can see where she would be hurt. So instead of just reading, you can actually take action. Doesn't Care. He left me broke. You are going through a wife abandonment situation when your husband suddenly leaves; without notice, without discussion, he's just gone. He is talking of selling the family home. I rush home to sit in bed and wonder what happened. We got a house then tried for another baby. I feel so betrayed, devastated and its really painful to me. She has lied to them and been found out. My wife told me we had to go to artiste counseling. Well, he left on an extended work trip overseas a couple weeks later and completely disconnected. How so? We have split up before because he has been unfaithful and we have always got back together. My ex mistress got me arrested and the charges were dismissed by he stood by her as if I was wrong the judge agreed with me though I was telling the truth. You will recover and you will be loved xxx, Hi, I lost 15 lbs. This menopause matter is not funny. I went to the closet to get my stuff and she had already thrown all my clothes in a pile by the closet door, when she folded and placed his stuff in my drawers and closet. I had to get a lawyer in another town, because of the good old boy club there. I want to move back to Florida and i just dont think its worth us fighting to save the marriage anymore. I feel used and devastated this is one of the toughest time in my life. I am glad she is back on her meds finally I guess I am just hurting knowing she feels fine while Im a mess. I live by this rule. Feeling an onslaught of negative emotions may make you want to reach for things that can immediately make you feel better. What city and state are you in? Either way Im totally broken, unable to cope and cannot see a way ahead. . If I don't do what you want, you are unhappy. I has been left with no rhyme or reason you can read my earlier blog. This was like reading my exact situation of 3 years with a narrsastic man! But nope we ship off to my place and to my horror she wont answer the phones all weekend which really catches me off guard, I thought we were doing something here. There had been so many years apart and having four children between the two of us makes moving forward difficult to say the least. So we moved and then I noticed she one week she ceas carry we cell with her at all times, this was not like her she even slept with it . I honestly never thought I would recover but it was a blessing in disguise because now I have my own home and am absolutely loving life. No matter how much you hated your husband for leaving you, the fact is, he still loves you. Your marriage can't be strong and peaceful if your husband is acting like he doesn't care. I took it over as there were 4super large steel trays full of food that would have gone to waste if I left it at home. Why hasnt society caught up with that? My wife of 14 total, 11 married just is done. Being in the military I have seen unbelievable atrocities, that others will not believe happened because they dont think it possible. I know it sounds stupid but I am still so in love with him and so upset Im still hoping he will come back this time. Is he really going to his parents house? When we met we had both been divorced so we started with the big stuff. Usually it is a combination of both, dont you think? Youre an excellent father and she should be happy to have you. He left his phone in the locker and i walked around for another hour looking for them. When I cheated on my husband, I might have liked to pretend it was just about sex, but if I was being honest, I knew it wasn't. It's not always about the other person. I dont owe you anything. She baits me along telling me she was weak and it was a mistake and it was my fault for leaving her a mess Wait, you kicked me out. It's called anhedonia, the inability to feel pleasure or interest in anything. I gave a lot of myself over to my marriage and taking on a lot of stuff trying to be a help mate. I hate myself and have become a hermit. ;) Again, terrific article! Anyone looking in from the outside would say Im a fool. Then it was time for us. I need advice. Friday comes and of course, she unplugs the house phone and turns off her cell and refuses to let me see my kids. maybe all you can do is find the best in good people and treat yourself and them with respect. So just like you want to be loved and cared for, he wants the same thing. But now that they reside with us again. And the person I subsequently dealt with was someone else." Telling her son and . The night we separated he told me he loved me but, Not in that way anymore. Now 17 months later he leave us. Thats not because of you, its because of her. Her husband barely talked to her. three months ago my husband called me to say he wanted my daughter and I to move out so he can move his girlfriend in. He refused to go to counseling. in the last few weeks i have asked him one or twice if being with me is what he wants and he said of course and we have had some really lovely days together, the night before we split up we had not a blazing row as such but it was the way things were said that was the problem not what was actually said, he woke the next morning left for work and text me saying he thinks I should go back to my parents house, maybe the living together situation isnt working out and then began to say he thinks we shouldnt be together he doesnt know what he wants he loves me but hates the fact we keep arguing and dont seem to get along the way we use to. I was with her for 95% of every treatment. We have a routine together. It hurts to have been so stupid to believe she ever wanted it back at all, probably just guilt for what she did. I am in a deep and dark place.I am totally stressed out.I love her so much. It sounds life a lot of work, but its not. .. Its just awful. They lost a mom too it sounds. Give her space and dont call her or text her If those people were true friends they would tell them that what they are doing or have done is wrong . The aftermath, says Emma, was brutal. Long story short we got back together. !my son and my daughter in law found me twist the rope around my neck and around the tree but it was broke, I lay lifeless and I know that is divine intervention with my Holy Father anyway my point is is that I would not be able to endure what my husband did to me, without Jesus I mean I begged him on my hands and knees and help me with the pain cuz I couldnt handle anymore and one day he took it from me I no longer have it like I did Im confused now but my husband so I dont know what to do if he were to come back into my life but I would do it because God wanted me to and marriage is sacred to God and I dont want to go against my father I promise you thats the only way youll endure the suffering , and be assured that with every one of my trials and tribulations I have found the blessing the blessings outweigh any thing that we have suffered and we also have to keep in mind look at Jobe what he went through look what Jesus went through for usits only through this Christ that you will find true peace. Its hard to think that way. I agree with you 100%, but how do you hang in there and try to fix things when only one of you is mature enough to realize that love is a choice, and that if you can get through the rough patch, things will get better? Practice letting go. That some young girl paid attention to him. Then quite quickly our arguments started becoming more fatal & terminal. Have evidence that he was cheating on me with my business partner /emotional affair? I received my divorce and was devastated by my helpless circumstance. He just kept saying it was his problem. He decided this life, our life, wasnt for him.. He has moved out and in the space of a month he had completely cut me from his life. Please pray for me. Been engaged for the last 6 years and my fianc kind of held off getting married for some time. A cheater will only admit to what they think you already know and usually they wont divulge all the details. We did everything together, camping, hunting, fishing, holidays, and Netflix marathons of snuggling on the couch. I was just so stunned, this lady used to have an actual heart, now I dont know what to make of it all I am so confused. We fell apart in every way possible. The simple text messages that said I love you or I miss you meant so much. A relationship is made of two people that are ready and willing to be a team. Do not let what God has put together be destroyed by a man/woman or their actions. I feel torn of the situation and the new person in my life has given me perspective on how relationships are truly to be. Im thinking of not paying the bills next month and moving out while shes away. I have done so much for her. Its the idealistic lovethe one that seems like the fairy tales we read as children. This is beautifully written. Theyre also communities where you can help other members solve their problems. She went to her mothers. Hatred is not something u do to someone u love, even I know this. I have never done this before. hi m Jesika m only 20 yrs old n my boyfriend which turns about 34 yrs who is already got married n divorced. Well one month into my overseas job that was just for 18 monthsshe told me she was leaving me after the financing on the new house fell through. I have a personality disorder and I know from info I have from my psychiatrist, John Hopkins U and the Mayo Clinic to name a few that personality disorders do have a genetic component. Because sinners are selfish! When I got back a gut feeling told me to check our trash in the trash can . They may view the depression as an anchor that will take you both down. As soon as we arrived in our new location, he started acting weird again. But he didnt come back. You will meet someone who treats you right and then you will forget all about him. I dont have friends that I can confide in, I dont have family to talk to. He had decided that this life, our life, wasnt for him. Our marriage had had its problems but we were so strong we had overcome everything. Read more inspiring stories of single moms: At 7 months pregnant, I found messages online to a dozen women, telling them he hated me, wished I was dead. Since that day my wife has changed. But from her doing that, she emotionally checked out from the built up resentment Im sure. She always eyeballed a house that her male boss was selling. By not fighting, however, you may be able to begin your grieving process, and subsequent healing process, sooner. It appears the more you try, the more you are rejected. My wife and I have a 2 year old son. He tells her he loves her yet he was still sleeping with me and knew I was trying to win him back. I hope you can continue to be strong and take the steps to be in control. Well she met me and and my legs were shaking really bad while I was talking to my wife about what I found and showed her. She will never understand just how much hurt she had made so many people feel so she could be selfish and live like a teenager ignoring the fact she has kids watching. Is evn more so when you realize how little value people place on others life and livelihood. And if its not normalized that this happens to lots of people, then they will wind up meeting and marrying someone else, and experience this same issue down the road. I am because I see him for who he is and I cannot pretend anymore, and that is a problem. Im married since 11 months my wife is very sensitive and warm hearted.. Because i was not dressed for it and i am not comfortable with my body. Perhaps your husband has a personality disorder. You will get all the blame and even find yourself thinking maybe it WAS your fault ! Hi Cassie Remember when one door closes another one always opens. My husband did the same thing to me. When I approached her she didnt deny it. You probably thought we were going to say go get yourself a puppy or something like that. The reason I write this is again there is evil and i have seen it all my life but the most important thing to remember is the signs people give. I was forced to leave my home as there is no available help there at all and what help is available is on a wait list and is for a facility outside my territory only (and the wait list is between 6-10 months). "We are outside, and it's important.". He has gone to his friends to see if we can make it work. I feel bad for those who do, because I dont even understand it. Last 5-6 years epic struggle to keep things on rails while kids matured to age where they could make decisions for themselves and process what was going on and why. I wish I just could stop thinking about it. That there was my mistake in itself. Pray, Give it to God and keep Faith. It feels better to chat about it, too know others are going through the same thing & it does suck. Sort the legal separation stuff and you can do a divorce online for free. She moved out without telling me on Valentines day when I was at work. he is getting laid off in I think 2 weeks and will be working back in bc and she will still be out there in a camp? His ex wife cheated and moved in with the girl she met.he was very hurt and hated her he said.when she found out we had moved in she decided to move to Vegas.even more he was hurt cuz she took her kids from him.its 4 years later now and she decided to move back. It is so heart braking, that I can feel my heart hurt.My husband makes our marriage failure my fault. It's OK To Fake It A Little After Your Husband Leaves. My now separated wife has called the police on me for suicide watch (ive never been suicidal) and also called childrens aid because I might be a physical danger to our son (the only hitting Ive ever done is on the hockey rink). My prayers are for you but know that the pain will subside with time. I dont know what makes it better. He was my rock. This is making me absolutely sick. There are not only 5 reasons a relationship ends is all Im pointing out. I have now lost my wife, my best friend and my confidant. Something that was completely against my morals as human being. All part of the manipulation. And some families have one parent. So, we did not have that much left. Yes I will stick with you and let the girls know they are unfair and mean in the way they treat me. I caught her in an affair with a coworker and then found out she slept with my friend in my own home while I was asleep. Sorry for your situation i am also dealing with a similar situation I was just told by a woman I have been with for 9 years who is also the mother of our 5yo daughter that we will not be getting married next month as planned she will be getting married to someone else this was completely out of no where considering the past five mo have been nothing but me working no less than 80 hours a week as many as 120 just killing myself to build our house and support our family not only did she leave me alone on Christmas she took my daughter and went to be with this man thats older than her granparents she refused to give me a few hours wth my kid Christmas Day eventually I took my daughter that evening thing I cant figure is she was telling everyone of our apparent wedding date and spending all my money saying how she loves me so much and cant wait to be married just hours before she decided it was not what she wants now being in a smaller town immediately everyone knows i felt really low like Im young and have my own business I felt like I was doin ok trying to build a future and she leaves me for an old man I was not only heartbroken but also felt so embarrassed ashamed angry I couldnt even pick my head up I couldnt look anyone in the eye it has been pretty much the most humiliating horrible thing I have ever experienced as a recovering addict I hit a low that far exceeded my worst days of being a herion addict at this point Im still in what ppl wold consider a risky time period for relaps however its just not an option i just refuse to go back to that miserable exestiance being fully clean I felt alive for the first time in years I was feeling happier than Id ever been my life was going great I just couldnt be thankful enough I was at an all time high in life my daughter was just doing great got my business going beautiful woman life was just perfect and then it happened hit a low I never knew where did this come from this woman I trusted with my life how could she just leave me I never thought I could feel so horrible using has not been an issue I know the outcome and I dont need it never got a sorry or nothing not a dam thing it just goes on an on the things got worse and worse big mess she just wont stop trying to ruin my life point is my friend I made really do love this woman more than I can express but I have chosen to sever this wicked witch from my life other than picking up or dropping off my kid as much as it hurts not to fight for her she must not love anyone but herself if she is so willing to risk putting my daughter into a broken home possibility of triggering relapse that will certainly end my life the shame she puts on all of us the lies told for months in church to her parents that happen to be the most amazing ppl I have ever known broke their hearts as well due to their religious stand point and the relationship I have with them this was very disappointing to them disappointed is an understatement I actually was feeling bad about how much it hurt them I couldnt believe it these ppl loved me and their grandchild so much that it really really destroyed their hopes after all they had done to help us get our lives together including the financial means to build a house that was for the three of us something I could not have ever imagined living in without them I originally was doing the house just to help them do whatever they wanted to do with it but then they were just like by the way when its done you guys can have it we only worked nights weekends on it because I never would let them pay me even when I had no idea they would give it to us just because they had already done so much for me in the years I been with their daughter one of the harder things about loosing my girl was that I love her parents like they were my own and I have for many years through all this nothing will ever change between her parents and myself that is a big help I try not to be angry its not been but a matter of days Im up and down I just cant be with a woman that is so selfish and put my daughter through any more than she has endured she has been through enough and I dont have time to give my relationship it all needs to focus on my daughter not to mention that her mother has not shown or made any indication that she is sorry or even willing to come back if you feel like you cant live without her you can I feel the same way but I know I have loved before and I can again in time so can you if you feel you can work it out and move forward with a good result go for it this is not the first time this woman has done this to me you see we have been down this road and all I can say is this was the last time I already know she will make an attempt to come back at some point but I can not let her as much as it hurts and I want to be with her were humans too we deserve better than the pain that type of situation puts us in most times they do it once they will do it again I also have found that in my experience the more beautiful she is on the outside the person in that beautiful shell is ugly rotten there are girls that are beautiful all the way around you just have to be willing to look for them cause they are out there then you gotta be smart enough not to let them get away no matter what no woman is out of any mans league thats just what ppl say that dont have the confidence to get what they want dont feel like you have to accept being cheated on because your not gonna find someone better thats just not true and inner beauty is the way to go Ive had relationships with both and the the pretty ones always make life unbearable I have only met a small handful of women that were beautiful and not messed up in the head beyond repair I have met tons of girls I was not attracted to that by the end of a conversation were suddenly starting to be interesting eventually I become very attracted to and they have been the best girlfriends hands down this has been my personal experience I dont know if it helps but writing about it helps me and hopefully you werent like me and your woman was cheating with an old man this girl is super hot 26 and she is sleeping with an old man I mean like sixty thats just I hope thats not your situation its pretty damaging to my pride manhood whatever but in reality its not me what sane person does that I thought what if I did that to her with some old woman no thanks Im not into it even if I was Id be ashamed enough not too be open about it so if anything you can get a laugh out of it I used to always joke with this girl about her doin this when we watched the movie big daddy once and after that it was just a little joke we had apparently I was joking ok well I hope you come to solution that leaves you happy I am not happy about the choice I made but I just have to do it its hard to imagine the woman you love being with someone thats not you no matter how old or young either way it still hurts and makes you feel like life is over but u gotta take care of the little ones gotta be their dad nobody can be his or her dad better than u and dont go back into something you know is over but you dont want to accept it thats what I did even when she told me she loved me I knew she didnt but she would lie to me and i would pretend like she was telling the truth because I didnt want to accept it was really over for good at some point I knew I would have to so now is as good as any good luck to you I hope you get the best possible outcome just remember your not any less important than her if you let yourself slip into that idea they will walk all over you but I dont know I dont want to give bad advice thats just my experience everything I said is the way it happened for me but cant say for anyone else women are all a little bit crazy in some way guess we all are, Stay strong brotha. I thought we had a happy life but apparently I did not have a happy wife.she never told me anything, never discussed it or mentioned it. She brings my youngest down in nothing but a soggy wet diaper in freezing winter and my oldest has nothing but shirt shoes and pants. She told me she left me for four of the reasons you mentioned. She never friended me on Facebook, never liked my posts, red flags were going off all over the place. And i did love her very much at the time, thinking that i was going to spend the rest of my life with her as well. We started dating young and it was really a fairytale relationship. Home Terms of Service Privacy Policy Sitemap Subscribe to The GoodTherapy Blog. The common age seems to be women in their mid thirties. Im at stay at home mom and he took all our money maxed out my personal credit card and I dont know what to do. She still has the full to snub her nose to cheaters on tv etc but I cant help feel like she took what we had and made it into the worst jerry Springer show imaginable and shes not even sorry she did it. Their best advice was for me to just get pregnant., My husband left me after going into a depression. I dont want to go on with life feeling like I do. I feel like Im slowly dying I tried and gave him everything I had even if it wasnt alot. In the past week i have been getting on good with her and i love her 4 kids and am a really good friend of her family.. Whit from Maine, Hi Im 35 my husband is 42. Where are you at spiritually and mentally? I asked her, without being overbearing or pushy a couple of times what was wrong and if I could do anything to help, and she assured me everything was fine, she just found this time of year hard. And she doesnt. You deserve to be happy, bottom line. My husband from the time they were little. So there are a lot of things you can do to help you get over the loss of your husband: Those are just a few of the most important things you can do to get over your sadness. A few weeks have now passed and Xmas has come and gone and no kids for me, nothing. I know it sounds like a hard thing to hear, but sometimes when people get divorced their whole lives change.

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